NOTE: Continuing our ICHC theme, I had a lolstory idea. I basically have the story mapped out, but it takes a while to write in lolspeak, so I'm going to have to publish it in installments. :) I can has copyright, k? Must ask teh purrmishun to republish! Fanku.
Catpurr 1: Big Smoo's Brekkies
Big Smoo started himz Caturday jus rite, bai rollin himz tummeh to teh skai an hasing a nyyyyyyss lawwwwng stretch. Den himz baffd himz faec, liek a gud kitteh, an strolled into himz hyoomins' rum.
Himz hyoomins, Tofu n Cheez, wer still hasing der napz, liek Big Smoo noeded dey wud bees. Himz jumpt up awn teh bed, an wif serpryzin graes fur such a beeg kitteh, gentlee klymbd onto Tofu's tummeh. Big Smoo, a Mayn Koon, wuz so beeg dat hasing himz paws awn Tofu's tummeh put himz faec rite in frunt uv herz.
Nao in pozishun, Big Smoo startid teh purring. He purrd jus a lil bit at frist, den gawt lowdur an lowdur, til awl himz floof wuz vibraytin wif teh purrz. Jus liek Big Smoo, wen Tofu woked ups, she streeeeetchd, den opind her eiz. Herz brown eiz lukked strate into Big Smoo's green eiz. Tofu smyld.
"Big Smoo, you're the best alarm clock ever," her sed, usin bof handz to gifs him a rly gud rub bhine teh eerz. Big Smoo purrded eben lowder in apurrsheyayshun. Den, as Tofu stretchd agen, Big Smoo hopped awnto teh floor, lukkin bak at herz as he strolld ober to teh door.
"We can has brekkies nao?" him asked. "I wud liek a littul bakun, mahself. If ur feelin ups to it."
Tofu slolee gawt outta bed, steppin into herz slippurrz. "OK, ok, I know, it's breakfast time." Her yawned. "Thank god it's Caturday!" her sed, as dey walked toords teh kichin.
"U sed it, bebeh!!" Big Smoo aggreed. "Hae, dis iz a wiuld ideya, but hao bowt sum chzburger ommylets?! U maeks dem so nommy!"
Tofu bendid daon an gabe himz moar skriches. "OK, you big baby, I'm working on it!"
"O SWEET!!! R u sirius?!! Mommeh, ur teh BESTEST!!!!! Dis iz gunna be so grate!" Big Smoo ran ober to himz fud dish. Himz faec fell, tho, wen Tofu pulled owt teh saym owld kibbul. "But... u sed..." But der wuz no mistaykin teh sownd uv teh borin, neerlee-pleh kibbul bein porred into himz bowl.
*sigh* thot Big Smoo. Himz stared at himz mommeh fur anuvver sekund to maek shoor dis wuzn't sum meen joak, den startid eetin. *nom nom nom*
Smoo herd himz daddeh get outta bed an coem into teh kichin. "Man," Cheez sed, "we've got a lot to do if we're gonna have that barbeque tonight."
Big Smoo wuz instantlee alert. 'BBQ? WTF??!!!!' himz thot. 'Dey be grillin?'
"I know," Tofu agreed, "we've got to get all those burgers thawed out, and I need you to go to the store and get more fries and cheese."
'An pikuls!' Big Smoo thot, tryin to send teh sykik brainwaevs to himz mommeh. 'Uuuuu neeeeed pikullllllls.'
"There was something else, too," her frownded. "I just can't remember... oh, I know!"
'Whew!' Big Smoo wuz rleeved.
"We need mustard and ketchup," her sed. Her opinnd teh frijamureratur doar an stayrd insied.
'Dammit!!!' thot Big Smoo.
"Oh, and pickles. And - yeah, probably some BBQ sauce, too," Tofu sed. Cheez leened arownd her to luk in teh frijj.
"Is there anything we actually don't need?" Cheez asked. Tofu smakd himz awn teh arm.
"We've got the burgers, buns, lettuce, all that stuff," her sed.
'No bakun?? Hyoomins has teh stoopy,' thotted Big Smoo.
"No bacon?" asked Cheez. "I'll pick some up."
'Gud Daddeh,' Big Smoo purred.
"K, sounds good. I'll call everyone and see who's coming over," Tofu sed.
'O yesh, an I needs to be puttin teh wurd owt!' thot Big Smoo.
13 August 2007
05 August 2007
Hatching Plans
Well, I sold two more books of poetry at the market last week. I feel like I've got some momentum I can build on - plus, we acquired another office in our suite, so aside from using it for work, I can also use the space to organize and work on magazine submissions. Very exciting stuff.
I've found myself getting better about making time for the things I want to do, instead of trying to find time. It's much more effective. I've been able to make a good amount of time available to work for my BB's business, while working more than full time at my day job and investing time into producing stuff for the market. The next step is to consistently make time for my writing and for pursuing publication.
Of course, there are only so many hours in the day... but it's all well worth doing. I'm going to print some more chapbooks this weekend, and possibly put together a new one. Someone asked me for a business card at the market, so I feel like I should probably put together a marketing website PDQ!
I've found myself getting better about making time for the things I want to do, instead of trying to find time. It's much more effective. I've been able to make a good amount of time available to work for my BB's business, while working more than full time at my day job and investing time into producing stuff for the market. The next step is to consistently make time for my writing and for pursuing publication.
Of course, there are only so many hours in the day... but it's all well worth doing. I'm going to print some more chapbooks this weekend, and possibly put together a new one. Someone asked me for a business card at the market, so I feel like I should probably put together a marketing website PDQ!
29 July 2007
The Joys of Publishing
No, that's not sarcastic. I get so much satisfaction from self-publishing. I've done a lot of it, giving chapbooks away to friends and family, but this summer marks the first time someone's paid me for my poetry. I have sold two, count 'em, TWO chapbooks at the local crafts & farmers market this summer! I'm over the moon. For some reason, getting payment for a chapbook makes me feel "published" more affirmatively than when I hand them out for free.
It also makes me want to take another stab at sending my work out for publication. Here are the problems with trying to get published in the commercial world: 1) there are a million other people trying to do exactly the same thing, and a limited market; 2) it's incredibly labor- and time-intensive to prepare the submittal; and 3) you end up having to spend a fair amount on postage, supplies, and readers' fees or samples of the magazine in question.
Really, what you're seeing here is one end of a perennial debate with myself. It takes a massive investment of resources to try to get published. But it's worth investing the resources. However, being a notorious procrastinator, plus busy with work and other activities, I rarely get past square 2 or 3. I've submitted a few things in my life, and besides the time I spent as a journalist, I'm getting published currently as a columnist in a regional pet magazine - but it's scarcely enough to call a resume. I crave national publication! :) The worst of it is that I know exactly what I need to do, I just haven't made the time to do it... yet.
It also makes me want to take another stab at sending my work out for publication. Here are the problems with trying to get published in the commercial world: 1) there are a million other people trying to do exactly the same thing, and a limited market; 2) it's incredibly labor- and time-intensive to prepare the submittal; and 3) you end up having to spend a fair amount on postage, supplies, and readers' fees or samples of the magazine in question.
Really, what you're seeing here is one end of a perennial debate with myself. It takes a massive investment of resources to try to get published. But it's worth investing the resources. However, being a notorious procrastinator, plus busy with work and other activities, I rarely get past square 2 or 3. I've submitted a few things in my life, and besides the time I spent as a journalist, I'm getting published currently as a columnist in a regional pet magazine - but it's scarcely enough to call a resume. I crave national publication! :) The worst of it is that I know exactly what I need to do, I just haven't made the time to do it... yet.
27 July 2007
Still here!
It feels like it's been forever since I blogged... Largely because I've been spending all my computer free time over at www.icanhascheezburger.com. Man, oh man - wayyyy too much fun.
Of course, the big topic for my first post since reading "Harry Potter and the Deathly Hallows" has got to be the fact that I loved this book. It wowed me even more than I was expecting. I read it twice, that first weekend that I got it, and have since started on the happy ritual of reading the entire series sequentially.
It's kind of bizarre to think that I can finally do that. I so clearly remember finishing the first book, seven years ago when I first started reading the series, and thinking of when the day would come that I'd have read the entire plotline.
And what a plotline... I'm not going to spoil anything, but I will say that I admire Rowling so much. She told the story incredibly well, and it was such a daring story. Well done!!! So much of what happened was unexpected. Almost all of it felt very real. There was one small part, in the first chapter, that I questioned, but it's insignificant in the face of Rowling's achievement with this series. *raises glass*
And may I say, I am so glad that pretty much none of my predictions came true! :)
Of course, the big topic for my first post since reading "Harry Potter and the Deathly Hallows" has got to be the fact that I loved this book. It wowed me even more than I was expecting. I read it twice, that first weekend that I got it, and have since started on the happy ritual of reading the entire series sequentially.
It's kind of bizarre to think that I can finally do that. I so clearly remember finishing the first book, seven years ago when I first started reading the series, and thinking of when the day would come that I'd have read the entire plotline.
And what a plotline... I'm not going to spoil anything, but I will say that I admire Rowling so much. She told the story incredibly well, and it was such a daring story. Well done!!! So much of what happened was unexpected. Almost all of it felt very real. There was one small part, in the first chapter, that I questioned, but it's insignificant in the face of Rowling's achievement with this series. *raises glass*
And may I say, I am so glad that pretty much none of my predictions came true! :)
19 July 2007
I Can Has Langwij Evalooshun?
One of my favorite classes in college was an amazing seminar on linguistic anthropology that I took my senior year. If you've never heard of it before (I hadn't, until I read the class description), it's basically the study of how culture and language co-create each other. Really interesting stuff. And once you start looking for it, you can see examples all over the place.
One example that's really intriguing can be seen on one of the world's funniest websites, www.icanhascheezburger.com. The photos themselves are funny, and the captions are generally hilarious, but the key to the humor is the use of a written dialect that's evolved rapidly. I've heard it called "Ingrish" but it's generally known as "lolspeak" or "kittehspeak". One of the major components of lolspeak is that it misspells or shortens words frequently. Other facets like distinctive syntax and verb tense are characteristic as well.
But thanks to a group of regular participants, the dialect's gone way beyond the nuts & bolts of language, developing referential slang, sayings/proverbs, and both spoken and unspoken rules. The website even offers different resources like a dictionary and usage guidelines.
Others will advise as "noobies" begin to join the culture. A great example is a response from regular poster "Turkeyburger", to a criticism of this photo caption from a new fan. The noobie suggested that the top line was redundant given the look on the cat's face.
Turkeyburger replied, "Redundancy is a fairly large part of teh lolspeak funneh. A fairly regular style of capping a pic like this one would be simply to state
“Serious Cat…is serious.”
It is just that intentional stating of the obvious, and for that matter, repeating it that makes up a large percentage of the humor.
After all, frequently the point is to write what we feel a cat would be saying in a given pic, and let’s be blunt here–I think most of us would agree that cats generally don’t have brains (or at least common sense) in bukkitfulls. I’m not trying to put them down, but we are talking about a creature that finds the inside of shoes obsessively fascinating, will run back into a dangerous situation that it just had to be rescued from, and willfully eats moths and spiders. There are many people who would not consider those to be redeeming qualities in a pet. Then there are the rest of us."*
Even during instruction, humor is the focus of the culture, which makes it both a remarkable stress relief for its addicts (and I am among them), and a generally friendly and welcoming community to all who want in on teh funneh and love animals.
It's not often you get to see language evolve right before your eyes. At first, I just found it all quite funny, but then I started noticing how complex and surprisingly formalized the language was. Some deplore lolspeak as a degradation of language, but hearken back to Shakespearean dramas or Elizabethan novels, and the lengthy paragraphs in which people spoke using rather more words than was really necessary and constructing grammatically elaborate sentences. Ahem. See? That barely approached the standards of formal language of a few hundred years ago, but in today's world, it's a run-on sentence.
Language is always going to evolve. As long as culture keeps evolving (which it will, as long as there are people alive on the earth), its Siamese twin, language, will continue to change as well. The two are inextricably intertwined, reflecting each other in interesting ways, revealing nuances about the subculture that a dialect serves.
If they'd read closely, the naysayers would realize they need not fear the world going to hell in a handbasket - at least, not because of ICHC... The regular posters are all highly literate and include a massive variety of music, movie and literary references in their comments. Many will step out of kittehspeak to share a serious thought or one that's complex enough to be difficult to boil down into lingo. Like the several thousand other dialects in English, lolspeak can exist side by side with it; in fact, understanding the formalities of English is essential to getting much of the humor, with lolspeak playing off the formal rules to maximize its humor.
Not to suck all the fun out of it, of course. In lolspeak, "Im on ur intrnet, analyzn ur dyalekt. Iz sillee but kewl. Kthxbai."
* Source: http://icanhascheezburger.com/2007/07/19/i-are-serious-cat/#comments
One example that's really intriguing can be seen on one of the world's funniest websites, www.icanhascheezburger.com. The photos themselves are funny, and the captions are generally hilarious, but the key to the humor is the use of a written dialect that's evolved rapidly. I've heard it called "Ingrish" but it's generally known as "lolspeak" or "kittehspeak". One of the major components of lolspeak is that it misspells or shortens words frequently. Other facets like distinctive syntax and verb tense are characteristic as well.
But thanks to a group of regular participants, the dialect's gone way beyond the nuts & bolts of language, developing referential slang, sayings/proverbs, and both spoken and unspoken rules. The website even offers different resources like a dictionary and usage guidelines.
Others will advise as "noobies" begin to join the culture. A great example is a response from regular poster "Turkeyburger", to a criticism of this photo caption from a new fan. The noobie suggested that the top line was redundant given the look on the cat's face.Turkeyburger replied, "Redundancy is a fairly large part of teh lolspeak funneh. A fairly regular style of capping a pic like this one would be simply to state
“Serious Cat…is serious.”
It is just that intentional stating of the obvious, and for that matter, repeating it that makes up a large percentage of the humor.
After all, frequently the point is to write what we feel a cat would be saying in a given pic, and let’s be blunt here–I think most of us would agree that cats generally don’t have brains (or at least common sense) in bukkitfulls. I’m not trying to put them down, but we are talking about a creature that finds the inside of shoes obsessively fascinating, will run back into a dangerous situation that it just had to be rescued from, and willfully eats moths and spiders. There are many people who would not consider those to be redeeming qualities in a pet. Then there are the rest of us."*
Even during instruction, humor is the focus of the culture, which makes it both a remarkable stress relief for its addicts (and I am among them), and a generally friendly and welcoming community to all who want in on teh funneh and love animals.
It's not often you get to see language evolve right before your eyes. At first, I just found it all quite funny, but then I started noticing how complex and surprisingly formalized the language was. Some deplore lolspeak as a degradation of language, but hearken back to Shakespearean dramas or Elizabethan novels, and the lengthy paragraphs in which people spoke using rather more words than was really necessary and constructing grammatically elaborate sentences. Ahem. See? That barely approached the standards of formal language of a few hundred years ago, but in today's world, it's a run-on sentence.
Language is always going to evolve. As long as culture keeps evolving (which it will, as long as there are people alive on the earth), its Siamese twin, language, will continue to change as well. The two are inextricably intertwined, reflecting each other in interesting ways, revealing nuances about the subculture that a dialect serves.
If they'd read closely, the naysayers would realize they need not fear the world going to hell in a handbasket - at least, not because of ICHC... The regular posters are all highly literate and include a massive variety of music, movie and literary references in their comments. Many will step out of kittehspeak to share a serious thought or one that's complex enough to be difficult to boil down into lingo. Like the several thousand other dialects in English, lolspeak can exist side by side with it; in fact, understanding the formalities of English is essential to getting much of the humor, with lolspeak playing off the formal rules to maximize its humor.
Not to suck all the fun out of it, of course. In lolspeak, "Im on ur intrnet, analyzn ur dyalekt. Iz sillee but kewl. Kthxbai."
* Source: http://icanhascheezburger.com/2007/07/19/i-are-serious-cat/#comments
17 July 2007
For the Record: My Harry Potter Predictions
I want to get this out there before the much-anticipated seventh book comes out (anybody else feel like Christmas is coming this Saturday?). Having reread the series many times, and again recently, I have a couple of ideas about what Rowling might do.
I think Harry and Voldemort will probably kill each other; if Harry survives, he'll be deeply maimed somehow and his survival will probably be thanks to Ginny, Ron and/or Hermione. I also think Hagrid and Neville Longbottom are the most likely candidates for the two people close to Harry who die.
I think there's a small possibility that Snape will somehow be responsible for Voldemort's death, with ambition to become the head Dark wizard in his place. I'm also betting that Voldemort's death involves fire. I have to admit, I just can't see Harry using the Avada Kedavra curse.
I think Harry and Voldemort will probably kill each other; if Harry survives, he'll be deeply maimed somehow and his survival will probably be thanks to Ginny, Ron and/or Hermione. I also think Hagrid and Neville Longbottom are the most likely candidates for the two people close to Harry who die.
I think there's a small possibility that Snape will somehow be responsible for Voldemort's death, with ambition to become the head Dark wizard in his place. I'm also betting that Voldemort's death involves fire. I have to admit, I just can't see Harry using the Avada Kedavra curse.
06 July 2007
Driven but unfocused
Indeed. I want to write, but I can't focus my attention on any of my current works-in-progress. Nor does the thought of starting something new appeal to me; I'm more in the mood to finish something, made rather more difficult by the lack of focus. Literary malaise is such a bitch. I should follow my own advice and use some of the writing exercises below (I should, but I probably won't).
Speaking of writers - which we were, right, ultimately - last night I finally watched the new Beatrix Potter movie, "Miss Potter". I thought it wonderful, myself. Renee Zellweger did a great job portraying Beatrix; the other actors were good too, but obviously a lot depended on her role and she really carried the movie. It was lovely.
I also think it could be partially responsible for my current malaise. I long for Beatrix's innate productivity. Living in England in the Lake Country would be nice, too. :)
Speaking of writers - which we were, right, ultimately - last night I finally watched the new Beatrix Potter movie, "Miss Potter". I thought it wonderful, myself. Renee Zellweger did a great job portraying Beatrix; the other actors were good too, but obviously a lot depended on her role and she really carried the movie. It was lovely.
I also think it could be partially responsible for my current malaise. I long for Beatrix's innate productivity. Living in England in the Lake Country would be nice, too. :)
26 June 2007
Summer's Literary Malaise
Or make that my-laze... I've just not been able to get into anything since my Harry Potter rampage. (Next scheduled HP rampage: July 10th.) I've delved into "The Kalevala", the Finnish folk epic, and Barbara Kingsolver's new book, "Animal, Vegetable, Miracle", but I'm more in the mood for fiction. There's something about the summer heat that makes me crave a good, strong plotline.
Did a little more work on my children's mystery tonight. It's been a few months since I last worked on it. I keep thinking each chapter will be the last, or I was anyway; I'm now thinking it'll be another two chapters. It's a little darker and scarier than I'd originally intended, but I like it. We'll see what happens on the edit.
I had an interesting conversation the other day with an acquaintance who has the happy job of editing books. She said it's good to get some articles published, just by way of establishing some publication credits in a somewhat wider market than, say, poetry, lit or children's books. Good tip. Time to get back into creative nonfiction mode...
Did a little more work on my children's mystery tonight. It's been a few months since I last worked on it. I keep thinking each chapter will be the last, or I was anyway; I'm now thinking it'll be another two chapters. It's a little darker and scarier than I'd originally intended, but I like it. We'll see what happens on the edit.
I had an interesting conversation the other day with an acquaintance who has the happy job of editing books. She said it's good to get some articles published, just by way of establishing some publication credits in a somewhat wider market than, say, poetry, lit or children's books. Good tip. Time to get back into creative nonfiction mode...
05 June 2007
Crazy for Harry
I resisted reading the Harry Potter series for a long time, but when I finally caved, I caved big. I devoured all four books then in print, promptly pre-buying each new release as soon as possible. I admit it: I'm a total freak for Harry Potter. I'm already getting excited about the seventh year, coming out July 21st, although I've also started mourning the end of the series. I know Rowling's going to put out an eighth book of some sort, but it won't be the same. Honestly, I've been both excited about and dreading the day ever since I first read "The Sorcerer's Stone".
Anyone who enjoys childrens' books, and imaginative settings, has to love Harry Potter. I don't see how you couldn't. J.K. Rowling writes brilliantly, and her characters are fantastic. She does a great job of roundly portraying even the most minor character.
I have this tradition of re-reading the series on occasion, and most especially before the next one's due out. I realized last night, after finishing "Division Street", that with as little time as I have to read these days, I'd better get started on Harry. I got as far as pulling the book off the shelf before I got involved in something else and before I knew it, the next day had dawned without reading a word. Case in point. In fact, what am I doing writing?!
Anyone who enjoys childrens' books, and imaginative settings, has to love Harry Potter. I don't see how you couldn't. J.K. Rowling writes brilliantly, and her characters are fantastic. She does a great job of roundly portraying even the most minor character.
I have this tradition of re-reading the series on occasion, and most especially before the next one's due out. I realized last night, after finishing "Division Street", that with as little time as I have to read these days, I'd better get started on Harry. I got as far as pulling the book off the shelf before I got involved in something else and before I knew it, the next day had dawned without reading a word. Case in point. In fact, what am I doing writing?!
02 June 2007
Thoughts on Division Street: America
I'm about two-thirds of the way through Studs Terkel's "Division Street: America", and it's so good. Very thought-provoking; it features interviews on civil rights, American race and class struggles like gentrification, and the changing world at a time when people's views on the world, civil rights and class were evolving rapidly, and more pressure was being brought to bear on these issues socially.
One thing I've noticed more about this book than Studs' others is the juxtaposition of interviews. At times, he'll put highly contrasting viewpoints one after another, each as certain as they can be that everyone sees things the way they do. It may be these shifting contexts that make this feel more like a vast ethnography of all of Chicago's microcosms, rather than straight oral history. It's more about how people's perceptions of the rest of the world, rather than what people do, which seems to be more the focus of much of his other work.
Regardless, as usual, it's going way too fast. One of the things I love about Studs' books is that they're easy for busy people to read, but they're so good that I find myself unable to stop reading. Another nice problem to have.
One thing I've noticed more about this book than Studs' others is the juxtaposition of interviews. At times, he'll put highly contrasting viewpoints one after another, each as certain as they can be that everyone sees things the way they do. It may be these shifting contexts that make this feel more like a vast ethnography of all of Chicago's microcosms, rather than straight oral history. It's more about how people's perceptions of the rest of the world, rather than what people do, which seems to be more the focus of much of his other work.
Regardless, as usual, it's going way too fast. One of the things I love about Studs' books is that they're easy for busy people to read, but they're so good that I find myself unable to stop reading. Another nice problem to have.
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